Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Not Since The Parting Of The Red Sea

I have been laying low the past few days, venturing out less than usual now that CB's summer program is over and four girls are home all day long.  Daunted by the idea of managing CB on errands and libraries and social events, I've edited down our running around to all but the necessary outings or the ones that CB enjoys, such as going to the pool.



Yet it is unavoidable that we will drain our supply of milk, juice, and dishwasher soap which makes a grocery store trip a must.  Pushing the gigantic cart with the God forsaken plastic car on the front and 70 pounds of kids inside, I hurry through the store with CB's arm linked in mine, fast and focused, throwing pounds of pepperoni, cheese, and bacon in the cart for her - the only thing she'll eat right now - along with the basic staples.  At one point she breaks free, when I am distracted by the thrill of a sale item for which I also have a coupon, and pulls a Usain Bolt across the entire length of the ShopRite with me chasing after her, unsuccessful in catching her until we reach the sliding exit doors.

I turn to find my children back by the produce, laughing hysterically, amused by the whole incident, so I laugh too.  The kind of laugh as free as CB's mad dash, impulsive and liberating. We will break into spasms of laughter the rest of the day when conjuring images of CB running, like a inebriated gazelle, through the cantaloupes and tomatoes and me dodging and weaving the confused shoppers, trying to remain as inconspicuous as a pink elephant blaring a trumpet.

Later that evening, CB barrels into the powder room, lifts the toilet seat and stands in front of the bowl looking at me expectantly.  Stunned by her initiation of toileting for the first time, like, EVER in the 17 years of her life I quickly free her from her diaper and she sits and embarks upon her first, deliberate, self-initiated bowel movement on the actual real life toilet! I shriek in delight and dance and we share a moment.  She got it, got that I was so happy and proud of her.  She looks into my eyes with a big smile, a loud hum, wildly flapping her hands.  I think I saw pride in her face... I really think I did.

We've been toilet training since she was 4 years old, people.  THIRTEEN YEARS of the least successful toilet training on the planet.  Like, I can't explain....

She proceeds to initiate using the restroom 2 more times that day, and though she had already started doing her business in her diaper, she at least knew to finish up on the toilet so this was major.  MAJOR!

This is a bona fide miracle, as far as I'm concerned, akin to the parting of the Red Sea.

Now, that's what I call a good day.  Halle-freakin'-lujah!

12 comments:

Elizabeth said...

I mean, I'm PASSED OUT over here!

Woo!

kario said...

I have goosebumps! And I am certain that half of the reason this happened is because you joined the girls in laughter at the jailbreak run in the grocery store. Positivity breeds more of the same. Here's hoping you're in for a run of it!

R said...

That's bloody amazing. Well done that young woman! Has anything else about her and how she interacts with the world changed lately?

PS defecating in an incontinence pad/diaper is quite difficult and usually uncomfortable (don't ask - neglect in a nursing home) so I'm particularly chuffed for her on that account.

PPS almost every autistic person I know, at any impairment level, finds the automatically-activated hand driers in public toilets really distressing. If CB's going to continue to use the toilet this might be a thing to keep an eye out for.

Miz Dinah said...

That IS a happy occasion! :)

Varda said...

AMAZING and congratulations! I think about all the "experts" who talk about windows of opportunity shutting down at certain ages and ... just... no. For you see change and growth are ALWAYS possible. Yay!

Wantapeanut said...

Yay!! There is always reason to be hopeful and celebrate. Love it.

Anonymous said...

I came by way of Varda's recommendation. I am now crying tears of joy for you and your daughter. I get this.

Mary_Flashlight said...

I am thrilled for you - thrilled I say!

Kim said...

Yay! doesn't feel big enough for this moment--but it's just what I thought when I read the end of this post! Awesome!!!

Alicia D said...

thank you EVERYONE for sharing your joy with me! I don't know if this is going to "stick" as these types of moments of clarity for CB are usually fleeting and few and far in between. But, I hope this is the beginning of something. She's been in a diaper full time for all body functions with NO signs of ever noticing or caring when she voids in her diaper and we also have a huge issue with fecal smearing on a very regular basis. To have her use the toilet, even if only for #2s would be a serious miracle and improvement in both our quality of life. thanks everyone!! :)

Anonymous said...

LOVE, LOVE, LOVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mama Deb said...

This makes me happier than Ben & Jerry's Phish food ice cream!!

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