CB's sensory room will be completely finished a week from Friday. While I'm very excited she will have a place of her own, I hope she doesn't lose this newfound penchant for joining in with the girls every now and then.
Sometimes, a gang of girls will be together outside or I'll be reading the three little ones a story and suddenly... Boom... there's CB wandering in with her tattered flashcards and knotted up beads and pants half falling down and barefoot and smiley and she plops right on down.
She stays on the fringes, seemingly oblivious to what is going on and completely non-paticipatory but clearly wants to be where the action is. With the girls. With her "peeps."
Once, several years ago someone (who didn't like me very much ) said... and I quote... "I'd never be so selfish as to have more children. I would never do that that CB."
Did I mention this person didn't like me very much? Incredible isn't it. I mean, that it was SAID but just as importantly... What's not to like?!!?
Well of course I didn't take any of it to heart because it was completely ludicrous and ludicrous things don't upset me because they have no basis in reality. Not a shred.
The fact that siblings don't bring something positive into the life of a child with Autism or any type of disability is absolutely preposterous. That would mean that a large portion of our population would then in fact be "selfish" in having the audacity of birthing more children after the diagnosis of an older child.
Now certainly, if one CHOSES this for their own reasons that is cool. But for a judgement to be made that it actually causes more harm than good to that child or that family? I can only speak from the heart of one, but based on my life's evidence - I disagree.
Having this 18 year old, reclusive, distant, girl come out of her shell and hang out with her sisters and the neighbors is... well... there are no words to describe it. It's pretty awesome.
There is a lot of goodness that comes from these girls being in CB's life and her in theirs. No one can convince me they all weren't made to be sisters, destined to be on this journey together.
As far as I'm concerned? You can never have too many people who love you.
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I always remember a woman in the OT viewing room (with a 2-way mirror) who looked askance at me, pregnant with a toddler and Sophie in the gym. When I asked her whether she had any more children (her autistic child was in the gym, too), she looked at me and said, "Oh, no. I'd never do that to him. Then I wouldn't be able to properly focus on him and help him." YIKES!
And you know I ADORED this post -- there's something so charming and domestic about CB and her sisters, hanging out, even with her beads and her flash cards.
I often wondered if I was doing the right thing when my ex and I adopted our son and added to the family. The whole thing was good for both of the kids and myself (I can't speak for my ex.) And now that my new husband and I have had our little one, I am even more convinced that it was a good idea. Polly has really warmed up to her brothers and that's saying a lot! She doesn't warm up to many people! I hope that growing up with a sibling like Polly will also teach them to be more caring people and educate others to do the same.
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