Friday, May 25, 2012

Make It A Kick-Butt Friday

My husband left for work this morning and told the girls "Let's make this a kick-butt Friday."  Because I was groggy from less than 5 hours of sleep, hurting with a sore back and suffering a bit of "wine flu" from Book Club at my house last night, I had to sneer.  What is going to be so "kick butt" about this normal Friday? Right now I'm dragging butt.

Today is pretty kick butt though, in its own quiet, low-key way.  It started out nice in that I only had to get one child off to school this morning with CB in Maryland for the holiday weekend and no morning Pre-K for Rella on Fridays.  Dr. Fabulous and I actually had time to hang out a bit outside this morning, before the mid-day heat pressed down.

After he left, I got to ease into the morning since we were hosting playgroup at my house this week.  Don't have to get dressed and run out... the party is comin' to us.  I can drink a cup of tea, stay in my glasses, slippers, t-shirt and yoga pants for a few extra hours and leave the girls in their nightgowns regardless of the company coming over.  We've done it before.  When your here, you're family... I'm not snazzin' everyone up just for playgroup!

I did, however, bake some quick cupcakes this morning for my friend's daughter's birthday.

I remember when my friend told me she was pregnant with S. I remember the day S was born.   Now little S is 5.  I know it's cliche to say it's amazing how fast time goes so I'll say this instead...

Man, what took her so long to get to 5!  It's felt like FOREVER!!  Time sure goes in slo-mo.

I have been in several playgroups over the years and I adore them all.  This particular group has been together for many years and we've watched our kids grow from little, sleeping lumps to toddling mischief-makers to Kindergartners and we've learned and laughed with each other along the way. 

I would have DIED without my fellow stay-at-home-mom comrades.  Died in an over sized moo-moo and curlers in my hair zoned out in front of hours of daytime T.V. surrounded by crazy kids and lots of cats.  I swear by it.  Or, we'd be in the poor house because I'd be at Target everyday "just to get out" and come home 100 bucks lighter each time.  I think they pipe in subliminal messages over the radio waves in there:  "You are just spending monopoly money here... don't worry... " 

Another group I've been in for years is my Book Club.  It has changed significantly over the years - people moving away or moving on, new people joining - but there is a small core nucleus of us that stay constant.  No one knows this but we have signed a pact in blood to be in the book club 'til death do us part and I have no doubt we'll be 90 years old and still meeting.  I just hope we're not reading 50 Shades of Grey at 90, though we might well be.

My kids LOATHE the nights I host book club.  Usually because I am trying to clean the house and prepare food while they are all underfoot and it always seems to be on a night when Dr. Fabulous is home late (which is almost every night) so the kids are all spazzing out, being distracting, needy, squabbling, and messy and my stress level just goes up and up and up and then I always try not to yell but I start yelling and "banishing" them to either outside or the playroom in the basement and you'd think I've just sentenced them to life in prison because all they want to do is be within a 1 foot radius of me 24-7 so the idea of "playing outside" for an hour is extreme punishment and they're all crying.  It's just a suburban housewife's version of a quasi-nightmare.

Tink made me this picture as I was in a full sweat preparing the appetizers and making them dinner and yelling at them for getting all the crayons and paper out and dumping them all over the table...

 Though it reads book clud sticky she informed me that it says 
"Book Club Stinks" in Kindergarten-phoenetic spelling.

 Tell me how you really feel Tink.

You know, this is the debacle I find myself in as a mother.  To do something for myself takes something away from them - real or imagined.  Then I feel guilty. Well, first I feel righteous indignation, then guilty.  The more wine that is consumed, the more guilt I feel as the night goes on until I go to bed swearing I'll be a better mother tomorrow... for the record, I'm never much better the next day.  Or perhaps, I'm never quite as 'bad' as I fear I am in the first place.  

My mother-in-law once told me:
The bad mothers never question themselves at the end of the day and stew about any possible mistakes they've made.  Only the good ones do.  
Man, I hope she's right.  

I sometimes fantasize that my kids would be more "independent" and that they could... I don't know... liiiike... FUNCTION without me for a nanosecond.  But then I think... The days are long but the years are short (stole this from Gretchen Rubin's The Happiness Project which was this month's book pick).

I'm in no rush to make them the most mature and independent 4, 6, and 7 year olds.  Do I want them to come downstairs and make themselves breakfast and turn on the TV in the morning so I can sleep in an extra hour?  A small part of me thinks wistfully "Oh yesssss..." but honestly, they are still babies.  MY babies.  We'll get to that stage one day, but for now I will plod down the stairs with my wine flu and my bleery eyes at 7 am and nuke those pancakes and make that chocolate milk and remind myself that for most of their lives they won't need me like this and hellz if I'm gonna wine and complain about it now.  Whoops, just wrote WINE and complain.  Freudian slip.  Sorry.

The days are long, especially when you're tired and your back hurts and you ate too much fruit that happened to have been soaked in sangria, but the years are short.  So, you know what Dr. Fabulous?  This is going to be a kick butt Friday because my butt is stayin' put today.  No Target, no chauffering the kids around, no dishes or laundry.  It will be kick butt because the weather is sunny and warm, we had a great playgroup with cupcakes, I ate left over junk from my Book Club all day, Rella is busy with a box of "new" second hand toys my friend brought over, and it's hot as blazes outside so we'll turn on the hose and go nuts.

Dr. Fabulous will make it home at a normal hour tonight and we'll kick off the opening of our swim club with their annual Umbrella Party where everyone fights to the death for their coveted pool spot.
Just kidding... it's very amicable.  And fun.  I'm looking very forward to seeing my pool buddies!

Memorial Weekend is upon us and we're gonna be livin' large.  
Especially after I catch some much needed R & R.  

Happy Friday.  Enjoy the holiday weekend!


kario said...

Have a glorious weekend, Alicia! I long for a book club where people stay more than a few months and I'm hoping one will come with my move.

I love that you have the playgroup comrades - they are essential to life as a parent, working or not. Glad Dr. Fabulous spurred you to have a great day.

Lexi said...

Dude, I love that picture with all of my heart. I'd frame it and put it up above my TV, because it would get looked at the most there.

Second to the tv.

I told Heidi that next Friday I plan on not doing ANYTHING. Just sitting on my butt. It's going to be EPIC

Alicia (Dr. Mom) said...

LOL Lexi - i think i WILL frame that picture!

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