Orbiting The Planet

The Question has been posed: Where Have You Been?

I am sorry. I had fallen off the planet and was temporarily orbiting the atmosphere.
I can't officially say I've landed yet, though I think I feel my feet touching down.

I have missed so many posts: about Easter, Rella's antics, the 2 weeks of stomach flu that ripped through our entire family... that was good for my second blog hiatus.

What's going on now? There is lots to catch up on but mostly it's the same. For instance, Rella is Rella. Into the fireplace ashes or the cream cheese container. You know, typical Tasmanian Devil whirling dervish type stuff.






I hosted Easter dinner and didn't poison anyone.


Had an egg hunt and everything! Aren't these little felt baskets so cute? From the Dollar Spot at Target...



My desserts were a bust, but the ham was good. Thank God for the Amish. They know how to make a ham not even I can screw up.

CB has not gotten into her diaper the past few weeks (cue the angels singing). The giant "onesie" is working. Instead, she's up to new tricks, like busting out screens if we dare open a window on a nice day... pulling out all of the dresser drawers until the whole dresser topples over onto the floor (or onto her)... emptying out 3 sunscreen containers onto the carpet and smearing them in like finger paint. She must be taking lessons from Rella. It's like, she isn't fecal smearing so she's just replacing it with other destructive schemes.

It's amazing I don't suffer from migraines. But I may be on the verge of a drinking problem.

Oh, and remember all my car issues? Let me recap: In the past 6 months I was
1) in a car accident involving a parked car opening their door into me as I drove past(about $1,500 in damages to my car).

Then 9 days later
2) I backed into a parked car,

then a week after THAT,
3) I hit a pole with the remaining "good side" of my minivan (on the way to the claims adjuster nonetheless). Then,

4) I ripped the leather seat in my HUSBAND'S leased car with a stupid metal nail file in my back pocket. Then,

5) My husband sideswiped a parked car (600$ of damage paid out of pocket),

Then a few weeks later
6) He clipped a rock retaining wall and blew out a 400$ tire which we replaced just in time for

7) a tree to fall on our car and annihilate it (after it hit our newly built home we only inhabited for about 7 weeks).

Now, let's add THIS to our "6 month run of bad car karma" list:

8) I backed into ANOTHER parked car. This time, I slammed MY new minivan into my HUSBAND'S car, parked right behind me in our own driveway.

Ummmmmm.... What is there to say....

To those 3 men out there who read my blog "Aren't you glad you're NOT married to ME?!?!"

At some point, the ridiculous just becomes flat out pathetic.

I may have to voluntarily revoke my own drivers licence. If you see me on the road, my advice is to maintain a safe driving distance. I cannot be trusted.