Thursday, May 31, 2012


We've got a birthday here!  A SEVENTEENTH birthday.  I feel like I was just getting used to the whole "I have a teenager" thing, now my oldest is one year away from emancipation.  So to speak.  It is surreal, bizarre, and completely awesome.

 Well, maybe she wasn't so thrilled with all the birthday hub bub.  She never is.

CB's birthday is always a time of reflection for me.  Probably a bit more so than with my other children.
Every birthday she celebrates, it is natural that memories of her birth skate along the surface 
of my consciousness. 

 Some of the more traumatic memories volley for airtime, but I try to just think of them as the road map that guided us to where we are now.  

There are things that are scary and uncertain given CB's neurological fragility, but this is the road we must travel and there are some things that can't be changed, only faced.  Only handled.  Only accepted as part and parcel of a life that is greatly out of our control. 

It was a subdued, reasonably uneventful seventeenth birthday for this little girl.  Yet, I think that's exactly how she wanted it.  And if she's happy, I'm happy.  

I have more to say, but I'll finish it up tomorrow.  It's too late in the evening to get all deep and analytical right now.  So, goodnight my sweet CB and Happy Birthday.  

I'm so proud to be your Mommy.  


Elizabeth said...

Happy Birthday to your oldest sweetpea. She's so beautiful and so are you. I feel privileged to have gotten to know you both a bit through your beautiful blog.

Becca said...

Many Happy Returns, CB!

SO not a little girl any more. :)

Alicia (Dr. Mom) said...

@ elizabeth - i feel the same about you :)
@becca - thank you and your right - she's FAR from little anymore!! :)

Sunday said...

Happy birthday CB!

We all love you! xoxo

kario said...

I'm so pleased she had a mellow birthday. She is so radiant, Alicia - it's a quality I see in all the photos of you and your girls. What a lovely tribute.

P.S. - thank you for your "mama bear" support on my "guilt, shame, and judgment" post. I feel very loved and appreciate your kind words.

Happy day, CB!

Tanya Savko said...

Sorry I missed this post! May CB's next year of life be as lovely as she is.

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