tHERsDay

We've got a birthday here!  A SEVENTEENTH birthday.  I feel like I was just getting used to the whole "I have a teenager" thing, now my oldest is one year away from emancipation.  So to speak.  It is surreal, bizarre, and completely awesome.

 Well, maybe she wasn't so thrilled with all the birthday hub bub.  She never is.

CB's birthday is always a time of reflection for me.  Probably a bit more so than with my other children.

Every birthday she celebrates, it is natural that memories of her birth skate along the surface 

of my consciousness. 

 Some of the more traumatic memories volley for airtime, but I try to just think of them as the road map that guided us to where we are now.  

There are things that are scary and uncertain given CB's neurological fragility, but this is the road we must travel and there are some things that can't be changed, only faced.  Only handled.  Only accepted as part and parcel of a life that is greatly out of our control. 

It was a subdued, reasonably uneventful seventeenth birthday for this little girl.  Yet, I think that's exactly how she wanted it.  And if she's happy, I'm happy.  

I have more to say, but I'll finish it up tomorrow.  It's too late in the evening to get all deep and analytical right now.  So, goodnight my sweet CB and Happy Birthday.  

I'm so proud to be your Mommy.