The One Who Made Me A Mom

Today I attended a sweet Mother's Day Luncheon at CB's school. Our last school luncheon, as my "senior" is graduating this June! It's a year of "last times," and a year of new adventures. I will miss this stuff.

How lucky am I that I get to do these things with my 20 year old, though? When my little ones were in preschool, they always had a cute Mother's Day Tea or Luncheon. Once they hit the first grade, that whole scene was pretty much over. But, with CB I got to enjoy these fun times for the good part of her 18 years of school. 

What I'll miss the most is walking into her class and watching her face light up. Today, she practically tackled me with the longest, warmest, most heart felt hug. I could have cried on the spot, but I was too busy laughing!

I love all my girls, and each have a special place in my heart. With CB, she's the one who made me a Mom. It was just me and CB against the world for nine years before her sister came onto the scene. We have a lot of history between us. 

I'm glad she came first because in all honesty, she has made me a better mother. 

I learned how to give without expecting anything in return. To care for another so completely and intimately. To trust someone loves you even when it's never spoken. To appreciate the little things because they are the big things. To chose happiness even when things suck. 

To accept that things are what they are. 

To accept that people are who they are and not love them in spite of it, but because of it. 

To understand that motherhood isn't about YOU. 

To understand that we can't control anything, really. And that's not only okay but it's good. 

And that sometimes people make you go without sleep for weeks and you still love them anyway. Even more than coffee.

And for that, and more, I am the luckiest Mom.